Mommy's need love too!

Matthew 7:1-5New International Version (NIV)

Judging Others

7 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ² For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

³ “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵ You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

 Have you ever noticed how as a society we can be so judgmental of others? As Matthew 7:1-5 tells us above, we are not to judge others, yet as a mom, I see it happen daily. Women have it tough enough as it is and being a mommy just adds to that societal pressure that we sometimes tend to put on ourselves. As a mother I know that I sometimes tend to feel like I am always coming up short with my mommy duties. How I would have loved to have been able to stay home and raise my kids and  feed them home cooked meals daily, and have all chores and homework done before husband arrives from a long day at work to his doting wife and children.  A girl can dream, right? Instead, I am faced with my reality...a full time working mom who tries to help her full time working husband make ends meet and still come up short in the end.  My kids have been raised up in the public school system and fast food and take-out are the norm just to be able to squeeze in homework between baseball practice and all other rehearsals. That is just a normal weekday, add to that the crazy idea that I should go back to school to get my bachelor's degree (because how I can I tell my kids to do something that I have not) and you have all the makings of my perfect chaotic life.

 Since my kids came along, they have been my world! I used to think that I lived for them and went out of my way to be the best supermom I could be.  Volunteer at school needed, done...team mom needed, done...project helper extraordinaire, done...homework helper, done... pretty much anything and everything that needed to be done I found a way to be the "got to" gal and I had a very hard time just saying no. I thought that if I could do and be all of these things for my kids that I was being the best mommy that I could be to them.  I did not want the fact that I had a full time job and went to school part time to be the reason that I could not be there for my kids so I wore all the hats that I could no matter the cost.  The thing is that the more involved I was, the less connected I became to my children. I had guilty working mom syndrome and felt horrible that I could not be all things to my kids at all times. Once I learned to put God first and surrender my family to Him it became evident that all my kids needed was for me to be present in the moments that mattered. I needed to come to terms with the realization that one day they will grow up and move on with their lives and that was okay. That was ultimately the goal anyway right?....to make them productive members of society who loved and worshipped the Lord. Who was I if I was not their mom first?   Maybe that is what scared me more than anything... who was I without them? I will always be their mom but the older they got the more I needed to learn to let go of some things and let them take responsibility.  Moms try so hard to be everything to their children no matter how old they get, but if you are not putting God first in your heart and surrendering your family to Him, then you are doing your family a disservice and not allowing them to thrive on their own.  So take it easy on the moms you see out there going through their own struggles. We are all doing the best we can with what we have and yes there will be times that we will fail but there will also be those moments that we relish the sheer bliss of our sweet success. If something did not work out the way you planned today give God the glory and recognize that maybe it was not His plan for you anyway and try again tomorrow.  So the next time the laundry is all over the house, or the dishes are piled high with the take out from the night before, or despite all of your baby proofing efforts the little one has run into the one spot on the wall that sends him to the ER, give yourself a break and relax.  If you see another mom having a bad day just send a heartfelt smile and prayer her way knowing that we have all been there at one point or another and we get through it eventually. Support one another as mothers should because after all, we are all doing the best we can with what we have. Love your children, pray with and for them and be in the moments that matter...